Showing posts with label books. Show all posts
Showing posts with label books. Show all posts

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

I Got A Book Deal


When I started blogging in August 2006 I was just having a bit of fun. I laughed at all of those fools who talked about writing books and would post a few boring chapters every now and then.
Maybe there was something wrong with me cos I thought they were shite while others begged for more but because I'm a nice person I didn't comment and if they entered competitions I'd vote for them cos who am I to stand in the way of their dreams, they'd find out soon enough.

I made up the joke, "What do you call a failed writer?............... A Blogger."

Then it happened, over the last month I have been in contact with some people who have offered me a great book deal.
I didn't want to jinx it by telling everyone but now I've committed myself.

I can choose 6 books from only 1p each.

World Books really is the simplest way to a dazzling array of high quality books at discount prices. Fiction bestsellers, homes and gardens, health and fitness, cookery, history, reference and leisure - World Books has got it all.

free colour magazine every month, unbeatable offers, guaranteed discounts, sneak previews, competitions and freebies

Sure I have to buy a further 4 books a year but that's what fake names and addresses are for.


Sunday, December 23, 2007

You Book Nazi

Horny Hilary as I call her wasn't very impressed with the way I portrayed her in my book "To all the gurls I've loved before" so she used her power and influence to have it removed from the shelves. That's what happens when you tell the truth. I met her at a fund raiser for her campaign as first lady er I mean as president, I shook her hand and said, "you've got a great pair of tits why is my cock not between them?" that got her interested. In fact that line has a 98% success rate in my experience.

Before you know it I was being escorted by the security up to her room for a night of wild banging as Bill sat in the corner of our dark room smoking a cigar.
She gave a speech the next day smelling like Old Knudsen sex.

I'd rate her 4 out of 10 a little too submissive for my liking and for what she did to my book I urge you not to vote for her.
If you want to read other Old Knudsen books I have listed a few I have written over the years. My agent wanted me to do books for the blind but I doubt as they can't see I'm sure they can't read either, fuck my agent is dumb. Old Knudsen Books