Thursday, March 20, 2008

Things To Cum


At times like this I wish I had been born a grizzly.

I've heard a lot of UFO sightings over the last year and into this year. Also I've heard of alligators killer fish , snakes and Jellyfish that turn up in places where they shouldn't be. The world has gone crazy well not the world itself though I have heard it being described as a living orgasm or some such nonsense.

I have also heard a lot of beast stories, no not MJ with an untrimmed vadge arena I'm talking about mysterious large cats that are seen in moors of England or Ireland.

"They ripped my dogs apart" or " It tore up 3 of my woolly vaginas er I mean sheep."

It occurs to me that large cats such as Cougars, Lions, Bob the cat and Tigers etc will attack large animals including humans.


The wonderful thing about Tigger is the bloody carnage. Bounce on this bitch.

Now look at yer wee pet pussy cat as it sits on the window sill with its leg in the air licking at its parts (the lucky fucker, not that I want to lick a cats parts) and think the only thing that's keeping it from ripping out yer throat is its size.



He-Man and his battle cat.

He-Man rode about on one but really a large cat will say, "tasty fresh human or a can of Felix, tuna and horse?" If some evil master mind came up with a cat enlarging pill we'd be doomed, they have penis enlarging pills cos I have a friend who got them once or what about those bonsai kitties? if you put a kitten into a penis enlarger surely it would also enlarge it, I have a friend who used one of those once and maybe still does.


A bit like the one my friend has.



Bonsai Kittens 'LOL' that!

I don't want to spread panic, I wouldn't mind spreading a few of my intimate rashes though .

I have to agree with the Catholic church on this one. During the Inquisition they put a reward on cats because they are in league with the Devil and witches etc and have been known to spy for Lemurs.


The only way a cat should explode is in a microwave.

I'm not suggesting you kill yer pet cats, well ok maybe I am but its for yer own good and besides did you see the directors cut of the Al gore film "An inconsistent truth?" well he says cats give off harmful green hoose gases that leads to Global warming and he also says "The Secret" is an excellent life changing book and the Da Vinci Code was nothing like The Holy Blood And The Holy Grail so if you don't believe me believe him.

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