Tuesday, April 22, 2008

8 Out Of 10 Men Have Tasted Their Own Jizz


I've always thought that dogs and cats were lucky jammy bastards, they sit around and lick their parts all day.
Old Knudsen has a confession to make, sometimes I can go a whole week without having sex with another living being (vegetables are alive) but my Pastor Bobby L Rapture says to be closer to Gog you should not got around with one in the chamber.
A wank and a jar of liver can becum boring after a time and I'm really sick of having liver for me tea 5 nights a week. I have suckceeded in achieving one of my life long dreams.

Men, if you want to suck yer own willy its best to be in shape, I touch my toes everyday, no really I still have the leg I lost to the Great white panda and like to touch the toes.
I watch what I eat, drink and smoke and I do my own stunts.

Its best if you have a really big dick so I found I didn't have to work too hard at giving myself some oral fixation. For beginners you should lie on yer back and pull yer legs forward.

So mum whats for dinner? will dad be there? what are you wearing?

Is sucking yer own cock ghey? is having sex with yer own clone ghey? Is watching straight porn ghey cos yer watching some naked bloke shag a woman?
I think it very well might be just like having a boy boy gurl 3-some but then so is a gurl gurl boy 3-some because weemen can be ghey too so if you like to watch leezers flick beans then yer ghey, for fuck sake 99.9% of the world is ghey, the gheys are right after all when they insist everyone is ghey.

Ghey used to mean happy but no one is happy anymore because of the media generated hate and fear, back in the day before idiot boxes and radios we all lived in ignorance and that was bliss, we didn't worry about what the wogs were doing, genocide wasn't even a word then, no pedos or serial killers to worry about the world was a safer place back then because no one knew.
When I left the Shire to tour with Gandalf and the Wizards the world became a smaller place and now I worry about alsorts of things I am too ill informed, we all are.
One week a cigarette cures yer chesty cough and the next it causes it make up yer minds. Having too clean a hoose leaves you vulnerable to germs and illness, huh?

I have one question before I leave you to go search for animal porn which is not ghey.

Did Princess Leia have sex with Jabba the Hut during her enslavement?