Did I ever mention about the time I was a Movie Actor? not a serious one it was just one of the many past-times I've had, acting, wanking ponies and falling out of moving cars, these are a few of my favourite things.
Everyone knows that Jews run Hollywood right? well I stumbled onto a plan to brainwash the world into loving Jews, now you're thinking that Old Knudsen is on the paint thinners again but no, I have proof.
I am not a big Hollywood star, that's my proof, if it wasn't for the Jews blacklisting me I would have been a star and you all know it, ever wonder why I'm writing a Blog that's only read by junkies, Pimps and their whores, instead of being the next Bond and adopting 3rd world babies, makes sense now right?
Ever hear of Sam Goldwyn of MGM ? that fucker was at the top of it and I'm pretty sure Orson Welles was his lackey, if you can't get Jewish actors into the roles, then put fake snouts on the gentiles, Orson or werepig boy as I called him claimed he wore a fake nose as his was so small, it would make sense but so does flossing and I'm not going to start doing that.
I walked into a nose fitting during the making of the movie Beau Geste, Gary Cooper and Ray Miland charged at me, fists were flying everywhere, I gave as good as I got until Susan Hayward hit me from behind with a plank (2X4 for you yanks) fucking whore.
I was taken to Goldwyn's private island of Sodor where they had a huge nose making factory, they tortured me for minutes before I finally told them everything, if you think this blog is long and rambling you should have heard me then.
They secured me to a small platform and preceded to lower me into a pool of man hating feminists, that's when Goldwyn told me his plan, he would nose Hollywood and then the world, soon fake noses, circumcision and Matzo balls would be everywhere, Israel would belong to the Jews again and they would become terrible but loved in a sick brainwashed way masters of the Earth.
Fuck that platform was taking it's time.
He gave an evil laugh, muttered something about going to stroke some pussy and left, giving me just enough privacy and time to escape, I blew up the factory making a witty quip about them needing nose jobs then I stole one of their fighter jets and got away, fuck I was smooth, now I'm not too good with the landings so I ejected, I'm really sorry to all those people that weren't fast enough to avoid the jet, hardly my fault now was it lard asses.
Now everytime an actor wears a fake nose or worse still gets an oscar for it that's the Jews showing me that they still have the power.
I couldn't work in the States or in a lot of England, I got a part under an assumed name in 'Take the high road' Mr Sneddon slapped me about and pushed me into a ditch, my bit got cut as soon as they found out who I was. I worked on Akira Kurosawa and Sergio Leone films, foreign crap really until in the mid 90's Mel Gibson was looking for Scottish warriors
types to do a movie called Wild at heart, no sorry Braveheart, maybe you haven't heard of it, Mel knew my story as it was now a Hollywood legend told in whispers around empty movie lots to scare young actors, he didn't give a fuck, they start all the wars he was fond of saying.
One night Mel promised me a cut of the profits as I was his best fucking mate, yeah we drank a lot , I never got a cheque so I assumed the movie bombed, just as I thought, I told him the period was too late to paint our faces blue and where is the bridge at the battle of Sterling? he never listened, if he had I might have been rich.
We filmed a lot in Ireland, the Irish army were used to fill in for warriors, who knew the Irish had an army? they must of liked pretending to beat the English, or to beat anyone.
During the kilt lifting scene if you're fast you can see my fine muscled arse, its the really hairy white one with the Dangle berries or lunch as I call them.
After Braveheart Mel's roles dried up, only crap was offered, Lethal weapon 4, Chicken Run and Signs to give examples, he had enough, he was determined to make the passion of the Christ showing how the Jews killed Jesus (well they did) Mel promised me a role as the old ethnic guy # 4, I told him I had better have healthcare as I had already worn out 3 pairs of hips.
Shifting in power behind the scenes drove Mel to start drinking again, I got a late night drunken phone call saying that he was fighting to stay in control of his own movie the Jews
were able to call some of the shots and I was out of a job, to rub salt into Old Knudsen's wounds Jesus would wear a fake nose, a total fuck you Knudsen.
Mel tried to get even by adding extra blood and making it gruesome, but he was now their bitch, first Jesus, then Old Knudsen and then Mel.
I don't mean to sound anti-symmetrical, but any nation of fanatical dick mutilating nutters who make the Arabs around them look good is scary, and one last thing to Nicole Kidman, it was the nose, not the acting that got noticed, you performing monkey puppet girl.
Why is it that if you say anything anti-jewish you're a hate filled anti-symmetric but if you stand up in the cinema and shout that Schindler's list anti-nazi you get booed? it just shows you who is in charge.
Mr Foot Eater, I slowed down with the posts, it took me 3 hours to type this one, is that slow enough?
