Thursday, February 8, 2007

At Least She Died Thin.


Anna Nicole Smith, Playboy centerfold, bride of an old geezer oil tycoon and reality-show hoor, died Thursday after collapsing at a hotel. She was 39.
She was staying at the staying at the Seminole Hard Rock Hotel and Casino the cause of her death in other words what drugs were involved are not yet known.

Just five months ago, her 20 year-old son Daniel, died suddenly in the Bahamas in what was believed to be a drug-related death, she also has a 5 month old daughter probably the child of her lawyer turned husband Howard K Stern.
In 1994, while performing as a stripper she married one of her regulars a 89-year-old oil tycoon J. Howard Marshall II, owner of Great Northern Oil Co. In 1992, Forbes magazine estimated his wealth at $550 million. Marshall died in 1995 surprise surprise though he had a smile on his face and they had some stiff opposition when they tried to close the coffin lid.
She had achieved some fame as a playboy centre fold but then became a big fat meaty wagon who appeared to be drunk, high or extremely stupid or all three and had her own reality show. Having gotten sick of being a figure of ridicule she lost 69 pounds allegedly with the help of a diet drug called Trim spa and instead of being a big fat stupid slut she became a shapely stupid slut, nothing sexy about this gurl in my book. This death is a surprise but I don't think I shall grieve too much.

In honour of Anna Nicole Smith's contribution to the advancement of weeman's rights
and world culture in general, here are some blonde jokes.

Q: How do you make a blonde's eyes light up?
A: Shine a flashlight in their ear.

Q: What happens when a blonde gets Alzheimer's disease?
A: Her IQ goes up!

Q: What do you do when a blonde throes a hand grenade at you?
A: Pull the pin and throw it back.

Q: What do you get when you offer a blonde a penny for her thoughts?
A: Change

Q: What do you call a fly buzzing inside a blonde's head?
A: A Space Invader.

Q: What did the blonde say when she knocked over the priceless Ming vase?
A: "It's OK Daddy, I'm not hurt."