Superhero Sunday

Like I know what day of the week it is, I'm the greatest blogger in the world not a fucking calender .

Captain America is indicted on multiple criminal charges. At the federal courthouse, a sniper shoots him in the back. He is then wounded an additional three times by gunshots to the stomach and chest. He is taken to a hospital, where he dies.

Due to things like:

Captain America: dead
Superman: killed by Doomsday

Batman: parents killed, sidekick killed, had his back broken Flash: wife murdered, dead

Batgirl: shot and paralyzed, then stripped naked and sodomised by carnies

Supergirl: dead

Aquaman: son killed, marriage wrecked, hand eaten off by piranha

Black Canary: tortured, mutilated, sterilized

Wonder Woman: dying of aids
Wolverine: erectile dysfunction
The Hulk: manorexia

Mighty Mouse: neck snapped in a trap, dead

The world needs more superheroes or Bin Laden and his evil minions will sweep over the civilised world (and America) converting all to Islam by the sword and before you know it dog grooming businesses and dressing yer dogs up in cute clothes will be punishable by death.

I propose more superheroes that will save us, yes this will be an ongoing thing as I turn them out from my hero factory in Killamory. I shall also produce villains because in the film "Indestructible" M Night Shake 'n' Vac taught us that the hero must have his opposite for him to have purpose or was it that Bruce Willis looks cool in a rain poncho and baseball cap?

From the new Wonder Woman movie, woops did I spoil it?

The world of comics is a tough one, especially for the weemen, to boost sales they don't just kill them, rape and torture is usually involved too. I can imagine comic geeks brainstorming how they are going to torture Supergurl with a power drill while they use their clipboards to hide their boners.

Meet:

"Can't seem to get naked man" with the power to answer the question, "how do you go to the toilet?"

"Homewrecker" with the power to hypnotise and make you do her bidding, she can also suck a golf ball through a garden hose.

The uncanny (get it?) "Tinman" who uses his big chopper and the indestructible power of tin to destroy all round him, this cunt is heartless.

"Granny Shagger" with the power to get added in to the wills of old weemen.

"Just So Wrong Man" with the Knudsen power of 'Not safe for work.'


And finally:

"MILF" the wet dream weaver, she can turn the friends of her son into babbling idiots and invade their dreams at night disappearing by morning leaving only a sticky wet patch on the sheets.

Which leads me on to these.

My new line of MILF "Silky boy" boxer shorts or "Dreamcatchers" as the marketing name will be.

I don't know about you but I feel safer already.