Wednesday, January 28, 2009

A Lovely Puppy Post

From the Telegraph

Snowy, a Jack Russell terrier, was born into a litter of six and then sold to new owners who gave her back when they realized she was deaf .
Passed from home to home and snubbed by her littermates, she became shy, withdrawn and would cut herself to get attention .

She was handed over to staff at the Dogs Trust Salisbury Shelter in the U.K., they found that she was actually very intelligent and soon was responding to a series of hand gestures meaning sit, stay and walk . "Snowy is very bright and learned remarkably quickly, so she's picked up half a dozen commands already," said trainer Leslie Carley. "When she first came in she didn't have a clue what was going on and would chase around causing trouble."

Some of the signals Snowy now knows include "Down" (point to the floor then flatten hand and move downward parallel to the ground), "Walk" (rotate fists), and "Relax and be quiet" (put index finger to lips). She is expected to add new signs to her doggie vocabulary in the coming weeks, and staff are hopeful that they will be able to find Snowy a home due to her newfound obedience.

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I feel dirty after that post. I have points and questions about this. When the dog barks does it bark funny like the way deaf people talk funny? No offense to any deaf people reading this, can deaf people read? I've heard stories about how some deaf folk don't want treatment to enable them to hear because they don't think there is anything wrong with them. Very fucking dumb if you ask me, what are yer ears for then? not for holding yer glasses on as being near or far sighted is natural no wonder Snowy was told to fuck off by her litter.

When yer deaf dog is barking away you'd have to throw a stone at it as it couldn't hear yer yelling, maybe one of those electric shock collars with a remote. For anyone looking to be the next Mrs Old Knudsen I must warn you that wearing one of those collars is in the prenuptial agreement.

Sign language my arse, if its so fucking smart it can get a job. I'd teach it sign language with a rolled up copy of the Telegraph :::whack::: this is a sign to stop shitting in the hoose :::whack::: this is a sign to stop wanting fed everyday :::whack::: and this is for the Queen, what a lovely woman she is.

I've heard about blind dogs or all seeing eye dogs which sounds far-fetched and mystical but not deaf dogs thats taking the piss, next there will be fat dogs riding power scooters and dogs saying they only bit the Postman because they are Bi-polar or "What slipper? I have no recollection of any such event."

There is an expression, " The more I meet people the more I like my dog" or is it kick my dog? anyway it was a Yank President so don't believe it. If dogs are becuming more like people then I have no use for them.
I don't want a dog e-mailing me saying it refuses to lick peanut butter off me balls due to the semonella scare.

Useless Information:

Mutt and Jeff is rhyming slang for deaf so is Corned Beef but you have to be from my part of the world as you pronouce it 'Deef'.

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