Yer twice elected President Bush is suffering from PTSD (Post Traumatic Shoe Disorder) and also he is having trouble with Turkey in fact by the way he was talking about crushing Turkey and feeding off its dead carcass I think you might be going to war again. I have been asked to give a State of the Union address speech so you all know how the cuntry is running.
"Look at me ya lil fucker as I squeeze the life out of you, pardon a turkey my ass." 
The economy is getting better, if we throw money at it we might get lucky somewhere. Interest rates are so low they aren't very interesting. Remember petrol (gas) its under $2.00 so where is the yay? however a gallon of milk costs $5.00 . I blame milk production and the general laziness of cows and the farmers.
We have a sound plan for the economy so don't worry.
We are winning the wars of terror no matter what else you hear. Numerous military and civilian causalities are all a part of our master plan so just stay the course and don't worry about the national guard being away. If there was an emergency here Old Knudsen will sort it out if in a sober condition.
States like Florida and Texas are still full of stupid cunts, there is nothing we can do about them short of nuking them all which I am all for.
We have solved the problem of the Appellation mountains being too pointy by blowing the tops off them and by a happy coincidence we found coal.
Washington DC is still a hot bed of scum and corruption thats not including the politicians.
The east coast will still be on the east and the fly over states will be renamed the 'Whatever' states cos who really cares?
We will demonstrate that we are not a socialist cuntry by constantly sticking it to the old, poor and disabled. The Constitution with be merged with the Bible and will be known as the Holy Constitutible.
Education is very important to us so we will continue to inflate grades to make the kids feel good and cut back on school funding but hey they'll think they are winners until they are out into the work force and by then it is not our problem.
Health care will be available to everyone who can afford it so we will tackle obesity, sex addiction and other important diseases and no one will ever be poorly again.
Alaska who receives vast amounts of Federal funding that never reaches the poor even though it has a small population will have its funding cut cos that bitch ruined our election or at least that is what we are blaming it on.
Callyfornia is a cesspit of liberal wusses but the same sexers are out thanks to the emboldened negros who have proved to be good for something ......... lazy slaves. The state will continue to provide for lesser states even though it could be its own independent cuntry and thanks to the poor economy which is strong the beaners have skipped south which means all the jobs Americans don't want to do are now available for them to do and I don't think they will be so snobby about it now.Our southern state of Mexico will still supply drugs to all of our cities.
Our Chinese overlords are happy with our looking the other way to their African and south American ambitions so we are all kinds of good.The water and air may be polluted, the roads may be falling apart but our dependence on foreign oil will be at an end when we drill in our nature reserves for the oil we have been holding out on for decades.
Be not afraid fellow humans the union is still united unless you count State and Federal laws and the extreme left and right wingers. Remember its commies , socialists non Christians that kill people, guns and cars are our friends.
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