I was over in the Congo delivering some top secret medical samples for the US government who have several research bases there so I took me some time to go and hunt some gorillas as I'm sure those fuckers are in league with the Lemurs . I now have a whole crate of these stylish gorilla hand ashtrays to sell if anyone is interested. I managed to get out of the country just before the latest outbreak of Ebola which happened in the same area as the base I was at, I'm sure they'll be ok I hope the villagers in 'test 1' and 'test 2' village are ok, odd names for villages I thought.I got an e-mail about how if I submit a 500 word article to this guy I can get 120 backlinks from 40 blogs to increase my Technorati authority for just $25.00. Then they said to check out his blog and see what over 60 other bloggers had said. It was all "this is so great I love it," so I left a comment saying whats the point? I'll just make up 500 blogs and link to myself for free, at the time of this writing my comment had still not been cleared on moderation, fucking slackers.
So sad sacks can appear popular by getting 120 links from various porn sites, I don't need to buy popularity, I'm unpopular and loving it. The last time someone asked me to submit articles for some lame idea involving luke warm bananas and gorillas I got stuck with Gollum the semi-retarded spammer.
A thing I learned from my time jungle fighting with Captain Smack (Elsewhere on the web on my sidebar) if it cums from the jungle squish it before it bites you.
Then I got another e-mail about a link exchange, heres what they said about my blog: very nice and interesting. It was a pleasure to browse your blog and to read about sexuality and other social issues.
Never mind that shit you forgot to mention how fucking funny I am, for fucks sake you know it has to be a Yank right? so anyway they want me to link so they can sell their Bullet egg vibrators, I might accept that one to just to bring a touch of class to my blog.
