No relation to any Bloggers of the same name I hope as wanking to that would freak me out.Its Palm Sunday I suppose, something to do with the end of lent that the Catholics talk about doing but never do, like New years resolutions its the thought that counts. It celebrates the time when Jesus rode into Jerusalem on a donkey from the south gate which fulfilled a prophecy saying that the Protestant messiah would do so, its all politics. Well I don't give a fuck you'll all be surprised to hear so I have designated this Pam Sunday, devoted to anyone named Pamela. To feel extra pammy today I will be having sex with Pamela and her five sisters while reading this Pam post. Here is the poem from that sex pot Pam Ayres, its the one that made her famous and the inspiration for the fine poetry that I myself write .
I Wish I'd Looked After Me Teeth
Oh, I wish I'd looked after me teeth,
And spotted the perils beneath,
All the toffees I chewed,
And the sweet sticky food,
Oh, I wish I'd looked after me teeth.
When I had more tooth there than fillin'
To pass up gobstoppers,
From respect to me choppers
And to buy something else with me shillin'.
When I think of the lollies I licked,
And the liquorice allsorts I picked,
Sherbet dabs, big and little,
All that hard peanut brittle,
My conscience gets horribly pricked.
My Mother, she told me no end,
"If you got a tooth, you got a friend"
I was young then, and careless,
My toothbrush was hairless,
never had much time to spend.
Oh I showed them the toothpaste all right,
I flashed it about late at night,
But up-and-down brushin'
And pokin' and fussin'Didn't seem worth the time...
I could bite!If I'd known I was paving the way,
To cavities, caps and decay,
The murder of fiIlin'sInjections and drillin's
I'd have thrown all me sherbet away.
So I lay in the old dentist's chair,
And I gaze up his nose in despair,
And his drill it do whine,In these molars of mine,
"Two amalgum," he'll say, "for in there."
How I laughed at my Mother's false teeth,
As they foamed in the waters beneath,
But now comes the reckonin'It's me they are beckonin'
Oh, I wish I'd looked after me teeth.
Pamela Anderson back in the day when she was actually attractive.
Pam Dawber from Mork and Mindy I heard she was 7 foot tall.
My favourite Pam, Pamela Stephenson. Born in New Zealand but quick to become Australian which shows good sense, she did a brief stint in Saturday Night Live, was in the film Superman 3 but became famous in Britain for being in 'Not The Nine O'clock News' which gave a lot of young stars their break, shes also married to that fine Scotsman Billy Connolly.
And I'm done, anyone got a Tissue? not to worry heres a dirty sock.
